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Home » Entertainment » Biodun Da-Silva: What it means to have a life partner

Biodun Da-Silva: What it means to have a life partner

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February 1, 2023
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I’ve heard the term “life partner” countless times, and recently, I’ve been brainstorming about its true meaning. When you hear “life partner”, you immediately think of a couple – a husband and a wife, but I understand that it means much more. A life partner is simply the person with whom you lead life. Life comes with its baggage and if you intend to live fully, you have to live for that baggage with the person you chose to ride with you. So, essentially, a life partner can be compared to an anchor for when the tides are calm and when they are turbulent.

Finding a life partner is the only business you do without trusting your years of education, but trusting your instincts and feelings to tell you who is the right person for you. Also, I know of some individuals who told me that if they can marry an educated person, they have been there for life.

Education and experiences are good, but they cannot be excellent parameters for measuring who should be your life partner. Life is a marathon and what you need in a life partner goes beyond education and experience. I have seen many people choose a life partner for the wrong reasons. Some marry because they believe a woman will be a good housewife, for beauty, intellect, convenience, charisma, sex, personality or monetary gains. Others because they are of the same race, ethnic group or income level. These marriages followed the same path – unhappiness and eventually divorce.

The requirements for a happy marriage are simple: love, compassion, trust, empathy, friendship, etc. I have seen marriages that were built on the breakdown of love and trust. On the contrary, I have seen some built on convention that stand the test of time. It is what it is; nothing is guaranteed. Above all, if you choose the wrong life partner, you will run life on your own.

Since life is a journey of momentum, we all need a partner to experience moments with. Believe me; no one can travel through life alone. We all need family, children, friends, parents, partners, and most importantly, a life partner (spouse). A life partner is that person who goes with the ups and downs of your life. Someone who will be able to pick you up when you’re down, nurse you back to health when you’re sick, someone you can find comfort, joy and encouragement in when the going gets tough.

A person who will be there through the thinnest of the thin and the thickest of the thick. A partner with whom you share your thoughts, whose energy matches yours, has the mental toughness and is equally ready to travel with you to build a useful life together. Most important of all is a person you love and who loves you back in equal measure.

Love is an important ingredient that cannot be excluded from the successful life journey with a life partner. You should be with the one you love and love the one you are with. Love is what makes man and wife stick together through thick and thin for decades even in the face of life’s relentless challenges. Being with the person you love gives you a sense of security, contentment, purpose and fulfillment that is necessary to live a meaningful life.

The purpose of a life partner in the life of each individual cannot be underestimated. Beyond resorting to some of the most crucial moments in our lives, they can bring out the best in us and complete who we really are as individuals. When we get older, we begin to understand that what really matters in life are intangibles such as happiness, time, memories, friendship and the indomitable feeling of loving and being loved. And importantly, the peace and clarity of mind needed to lead our daily lives.

With love, comes understanding; it is not complete without understanding. Understanding the mentality, character and personality of your life partner go hand in hand with the success of your union. You can’t go through life with a person you’re not on the same page with.

If your goals and interests are not aligned, your union is doomed to fail upon arrival. A man with a progressive mentality cannot be entangled with a woman with a regressive mentality if the goal of such a union is progress. But if that happens, such a couple would take 1 step forward and ten steps back for the entire life of their union. However, this is not to say that having the right life partner will exempt you from life’s challenges. It won’t be, but it would make the trip worthwhile for all parties involved.

Also, from a spiritual perspective, humans are spiritual elements. A union between two people is deeper than what we see on the surface. You cannot be a fire and be married to water. We need a cheerleader, we also need a spouse who will serve as an amplifier so that who we really are and who we hope to become can be manifested for all.

Personally, I know that true love exists. It cannot be willed or forced. Love yourself first, then love yourself like your life depends on it. Most importantly, love enough to choose well.

“Love doesn’t make the world go round, love is what makes the journey worthwhile” – Franklin P Jones.


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